Let me start this post by clarifying that although I talk about weight loss, this post is NOT about weight loss. Neither is it about health per say. It's about making better decisions for me and my body so that I feel good on a consistent basis.
Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, I weighed close to 400 lbs. And honey, I was HAPPY with my chunky body. I had a load of confidence (someone cue Lizzo's new album) and I was completely healthy. No diabetes, no high blood pressure, no high cholesterol, nada, nilch....nothing. Every time I got a physical I was in the best of health however they would always talk about the risks associated with my weight and that BMI stuff. I paid them no mind.
I have challenged myself in so many ways over the years and I decided to challenge myself to lose weight. I gave up sugar, ate mostly fruits, veggies and fish and I lost a lot of weight. Then I started becoming self conscious about my body (go figure). I mentally prepared for the challenge and did it in stages. It took time and wasn't always fun but I was determined. But is this kind of lifestyle sustainable? Would you want to go forever without the things you love so much? I still don't know. It's a catch 22.
What I do know is that I got a partial hysterectomy where they took everything but one ovary. Then I developed a cyst on that remaining ovary so they took that as well and I was thrown into menopause. The ease of which I accomplished the challenges I previously placed on myself was no longer there. The willpower had disappeared. Things I hadn't eaten in years like candy bars, once again started to appeal to me. And before I knew it, I was hooked on sugar.
My hormones were out of wack. My body started aching, knees started hurting and continuous excuses were made. I just couldn't get it together. That sugar crack had a hold on me. So, I decided I wanted to go on a sugar fast. Usually I make a decision and just do it. My love always says "You go 0 to a hundred real quick". Not this time. It took me 30 days just to mentally prepare.
After all that mental preparation on the day I decided to start, I looked in the mirror into my eyes and said to myself: "Girl, you know I love you right? You know I love you no matter how big or small you are? You know I love you no matter how many belly rolls you have, right? You know that I love every jiggly part of your body, don't you? And as much as I love everything that you are right now, there are some changes that have to be made. Girl, we gotta do something different. Your knees are cracking and you get winded when you even try to think about climbing up some stairs. Boo, we have some decisions to make. What do you want? You want to feel good? OK, we can do that. What do you suggest? Where can we start? What sacrifices are you willing to make to feel good? You willing to let that sugar go? You know I love you, right? You know I got you, right? We can do this but we have to work together. You ready? You know you cute, right? OK, let's do this." And then I blasted Drake's O to 100.
I am on day 2. I am motivated and I feel good.
Depression survivor that discovered the power of positive thinking.